Some Smoke and a Red Locker Review from Goldcat Films!
Okay so before you dive into this review, I need to be clear – I don’t like stoner movies. Not even Cheech & Chong! These sort of flicks and the standard contents bore me. The humour is tedious, and to me most films seem the same. Don’t get me wrong here, I partake now and then usually at parties if I need to sober up quickly for whatever reason, or chilled out doing the old “take two and pass” routine with friends, but “we’re so cool” stoner flicks leave a really bitter taste in my mouth also due to certain things I’ve witnessed in my life (people becoming absolute arseholes or thinking they have superior intellect, or worse — selling their kid’s stuff to buy a bag like they’re on smack or something, or just neglecting themselves financially until they haven’t enough cash for much else). So why am I reviewing Some Smoke and a Red Locker, a stoner picture then?
I recently reviewed the quirky Planet Zee (see review here) by the masterful Zetkin Yikilmis who (along with her hubby) is a lady that can take something very low budget and create eye-catching weaponry, a bit like the A-Team being locked up with two dustbins and some wire, then building an armoured tank!
Some Smoke and a Red Locker is an earlier movie by Zetkin, and as she said to me, she loves it, it’s her baby. Unfortunately, she was shafted by the distribution label, but as I said at least this, and Planet Zee will get her noticed and hopefully Zetkin will rise up in the ranks of underground beasts.
With that in mind I’m going to remove the element ranted about thus far to concentrate on the story, the comedy, and overall mad sci-fi ingredients. For instance, brothers Rufus and Brutus have built a time machine. Rufus is the hardware specialist whilst Brutus deals with the software. As expected by the title, it looks just like a red locker but with a couple of lights and a keyboard stuck at the rear.
Naturally when they try it out, nothing works. Later that night they discover a zombie walking around the house. “Zombie rule number two… Double tap!” the walking cadaver is dispatched very quickly. Brutus figures that it was sent to kill them thus stopping them from becoming the first ever time travellers. Heading down into the basement where their time machine stands, it all points to the source of the zombie.
Next out and attacking the toy cat loving lady (Mrs. Joy) down the hall, is a reptile mask wearing hooded goober speaking cretin that is beaten by the woman again very quickly until blood runs down the mask. Enough is enough, after some more fights ‘n’ shizz, our boys need help so they head off to visit Uncle Joe to be trained in the ways of tackling monsters (a werewolf, a mummy, vampires) or something or other (it seems they were training a monster army??!!) Look, I skipped through one or two scenes. Oh my God! Only once before did your dearly beloved Severed Creepy Man ever do that! Unfortunately, this is where I am with Some Smoke and a Red Locker.
There’s a subplot involving Agent Mara (played by Zetkin) which to be honest as I stated above, I kind of lost the whole meaning of aside from goofy dancing, some fighting and such. I presume she was out to steal the machine, but I have no idea. Plus, we have overlong scenes featuring Uncle Joe, played with gusto by Michael Tietz who has been in a whole load of things over the years. He livens things up a bit but I can’t help but shake the feeling that so much could have been trimmed here and there because a lot of the movie gets bogged down by constant lengthy pointlessness and really (it felt like) lapse directing. In saying that, perhaps Zetkin realized that or changed her style because the same cannot be said for ol’ Planet Zee.
Why do I feel this way? How could I like and really vibe with Planet Zee but not this?
Unlike that follow-up movie in which I bonded with the characters to the extent that I could totally feel where the film wanted to go, in this however, I found just about every person overly irritating with the exception of – believe it or not – Brutus and Rufus, the two stoner’s whom I would normally get bored by. Because the humour didn’t work on me (wherein it did in Planet Zee) the creature masks just pissed me off, as did the overall purposely cheesiness which again was absolutely cool in Planet Zee. Parts of this felt like a childish giggle only chuckled over by those involved.
Alexander (Planet Zee) Tsypilev and Narsh (When Love Comes Around) Alexei Smith are very good in their central roles, holding together what plot there is blasting all over the place.
Some Smoke and a Red Locker will do the job for some viewers, I suppose, who aren’t too critical of the mashed up story, the sluggish directing, and the feeling that it’s all been done before but in a more interesting way. Yet for me, I wanted to enjoy it. Aside from the stoner vibe I went in with high hopes but by the 30-minute or so mark I’d totally lost everything. I’m so glad I watched Planet Zee first and I can look forwards to boosting Zetkin and her rise on Severed Cinema when her next film comes out. I can see the solid work that goes into these films so credit where credit is due.
I saw on social media how Zetkin was a bit miffed by some reviewer who didn’t embrace the complete Planet Zee experience (for the record I made the comment that the bloke’s review wasn’t actually too bad) so goodness knows what she’ll make of this one! Well, Some Smoke and a Red Locker is in your past, and Planet Zee is in the nowadays so don’t get too annoyed eh?
I almost forgot, big crimson thumbs up to Roland Bialke, the geeza who portrayed the demon in Planet Zee, back in 2019. He took on a challenging trilogy of roles – the zombie, the mummy, and one of the cops involved in the grand finale shoot out.
Directed by: Zetkin Yikilmis | Written by: Zetkin Yikilmis | Produced by: SB Goldberg, Zetkin Yikilmis, Dominic Yikilmis | Cinematography by: Dominic Yikilmis | Editing by: Zetkin Yikilmis | Music by: Cornel Hecht | Special Effects by: Michael Noller, Nadin Charlotte Bickert, Felix Jones | Cast: Alexander Tsypilev, Narsh Alexei Smith, Michael Tietz, Zetkin Yikilmis, Roland Bialke | Year: 2018 | Country: Germany | Language: English | Colour: Colour | Runtime: 1h 33min
Studio: Yikilmis Filmproduktion, Goldcat Films
Distributor: Green Apple Entertainment
