Ugly World: Ten
UGLY WORLD VOLUME 10
GOOGLE AD-NONSENSE
Google Adsense is a program that allows web site owners to make some money by having clickable links on the site. Severed Cinema was a part of the program, until they notified Chris Severed that they were kicking him out of the program, because of the violations of their terms and conditions. As an example, they mentioned specifically, an Ugly World column. Sorry Chris! They would have taken it down anyway those motherfuckers!
BP’S UGLY WORLD
BP (British Petroleum) has helped turn a big portion of the Earth into an Ugly World when one of their oil pipelines burst open under water, spilling millions and millions of oil into the sea and onto the coastlands. My wife flew from Miami to New Orleans and could see the oil from the airplane. She said it was like watching a rape or murder.
When Saddam Hussein withdrew from Kuwait, he committed atrocious acts of environmental terrorism by igniting every oil well his army passed by. It was an act that can only be described as evil, although, like the bombing of the World Trade Center, very entertaining, as evidenced by the mass news coverage. And he got executed for it. Yet when the oil corporation committed a far worse crime, they get apologies from Republicans for the Obama ‘shake down’. What should be done to these limey fuck-nuts?
First, a review of the Execution of Saddam Hussein which can be found on various sites like youtube. The quality is shitty and the camerawork shaky, but that is understandable as it was filled from a phone. It is an ominous video, with creepy Arabic chanting in the background and masked Muslim fanatics full of hatred and the desire for blood. Saddam is defiant to the end, cursing his executioners. Then he is hung with a rope, we see him hang dead, and the video ends. Thumbs up?
Back to BP: How about water boarding these cockney pricks with oil?
ASPHYXIATION
WATER BOARDING
Water boarding involves bringing the victim to the point of death by asphyxiation, then reviving him at the last second, only to do it again, and again. This is done by holding the victim’s head underwater, or by holding him with a towel in his mouth and soaking the towel. The victim is placed in a position so that he chokes on the water. This torture/interrogation technique made the news during the Afghanistan war because of its use by US officials in various terrorist prison camps.
Recently, a 27-year-old Iraqi war vet who served 15-months in Iraq quizzed his four year old daughter on her ABCs. When she couldn’t get them right, he water boarded her in the kitchen sink. He admitted that he knew she was terrified of water so that the water boarding was a particularly brutal torture. He was found wandering the streets drunk out of his mind, threatening to smash things with a Kevlar helmet. The military must be so proud.
GARROTING
The most sadistic and power-hungry serial killers, such as killer clown John Wayne Gacy, engage in a practice similar to water boarding, only involving strangulation, either ligature or manual. In both, water boarding and garroting, the brain is deprived of oxygen until the victim goes unconscious or dies. For serial killers, the ultimate torture/murder method does not involve a water board, but asphyxiation by their hands or a garrote. The torturer strangles and revives his victims, with total power over the victim’s life and death, the ultimate power high. They choke the victim with their hands (manual strangulation) or a garrote (ligature strangulation), then release the victims seconds before death, briefly reviving them only to strangle them some more, allowing the killer to ‘kill’ his victim for hours and days. The garrote (think of taking nunchucks and wrapping the chain around someone’s neck, then twisting the handles tighter and tighter until the person chokes to death) is a more effective technique than using your hands because it is more accurate, and thus allows the torturer to inflict the maximum amount of suffering. Ligature strangulation by garrote involves wrapping a rope (or piano wire, towel, stockings, etc.) around the victim’s neck. The rope is tied to a stick behind the victim’s neck, so that when it is twisted one way, it tightens the chokehold, and when it is twisted the other way the victim gets some breathing room. This allows the torturer to tighten or loosen the rope at will, giving him absolute control.
In the S&M world, where this is done voluntarily, the slang terms are “Breath Control” or “Erotic Asphyxiation” and its practitioners are called asphyxiaphiliacs and Republicans.
Historically, elaborately made garrotes were used for executing persons. The old fashioned original garrotes were chairs with headpieces that bound the victim to the chair, while a lever was twisted, choking the victim to death.
THE GRIM SLEEPER
While the Joran van der Sloot killing has made news across the world, a much more prolific serial killer — and his victims — have been virtually ignored by the media. How many people know about the California serial killer known as The Grim Sleeper? The man killed many people (his official death toll is 11, police believe that is less than half of his actual victims, and he at one point was also a suspect in the L.A. Southside Slayer killings), then stopped for 13 years. After over a decade, he started killing again. Because of the long period without any kills (that are known to authorities) the media labeled him The Grim Sleeper. Most of his victims were poor black females, several of them prostitutes.
There is one eyewitness — a victim who lived — who described him as a black man in his thirties. He shot her in the chest then raped her. For some reason he let her go after this, probably assuming she was about to die. She lived and was the only living witness. It was after her bungled murder attempt that he stopped killing and went into sleeper mode. A member of one of the victim’s families pointed to the van der Sloot case, noting that officials went all the way to Aruba to find her, and that her case received intense media scrutiny. The victim was an attractive young blond haired white woman. Yet in the Grim Sleeper case, police wouldn’t even drive to Inglewood to interview family members of the victims. In fact, they were never even told that a serial killer was responsible. So Joran van der Sloot’s big mistake (see next column for more on van der Sloot) was targeting attractive young women not involved in prostitution (especially after the death of his father who had been able to protect him).
This month, in breaking Ugly World news, the Grim Sleeper was caught. Lonnie Franklin Jr. was charged with the murders.
This leads to my key question (feel free to post your answers): Who is a bigger piece of shit, the executives at BP or The Grim Sleeper? I’m not sure, but BP has billions of dollars and support by a former US vice president (the Dick who shot his friend in the face). Jail will probably stop The Grim Sleeper, but nothing seems capable of stopping BP and their mess. The Grim Sleeper is obviously the more intelligent, but without support from highly paid politicians and lobbyists.
Gokkun: Like bukkake, is a fetish from Japan. Gokkun films involve women drinking large amounts of semen, often licking it up, or drinking it out of a glass. There are some American Gokkun films.
BUG CHASING
Remember when you were a kid, and someone got chicken pox, and your parents would take you to his or her house for a pox party, for the purpose of infecting all the kids with chicken pox? These parties are hosted out of safety concerns, as chicken pox is a much more serious condition for adults. Now imagine a party where you get together with others for the purpose of catching AIDS, or infecting others with AIDS. Bug Chasers are HIV negative gay men who want to catch AIDS, finding the act of the transmission of AIDS to be the ultimate erotic act, the ultimate taboo, the ultimate sexual thrill. The AIDS-infected semen is like some nectar of the Gods. At HIV Russian Roulette Parties, one HIV positive man and nine HIV negative men will suck and fuck until they run out of meth.
AIDS is seen as a wonderful gift, and bug chasers are jealous of the closeness of the AIDS community. Who provides the AIDS? Men called Gift Givers happily spread their seed and disease.
There are several reasons why some engage in bug chasing, and the reasons tend to be nihilistic. Some promiscuous bare-backers (people who don’t use condoms) assume they will get it anyway, and find it empowering to choose when and how they receive the AIDS virus. Many people are potentially both bug chasers and gift givers — they have unprotected sex, and have never been tested for AIDS. They assume they have it, or will get it, or else just don’t care, and with every sexual experience there is the erotic possibility that one will either spread AIDS or catch it. Some gift givers find sadistic pleasure in essentially murdering people. Some bug chasers actually catch the virus so that they will be eligible for medical and other benefits, which says a lot about US healthcare (earlier this year a woman with no health care and a serious and painful condition in her arm shot herself in that arm because she couldn’t afford a doctor. Note: this plan backfired as the bullet wound was treated but not her underlying condition, now worsened by a bullet wound).
BARB WIRE
Pamela Lee Anderson stars in Barb Wire, a movie that is terrible in epic proportions. Imagine an unsexy version of Showgirls. See this if you want a good comedy, or if you are in film class and want to know how not to make a film. This film is bad on a level I have never before experienced.
First of all, Pamela looks like a man. Yes, you read that correctly, but I will repeat it: Pamela looks like a man. She is covered in thick black makeup. When we first see her, she is topless, which surprised me because she looked like a guy, yet she clearly has large breasts. I asked my wife “Is that a dude?” At that exact moment, my wife said, “She looks like a drag queen.” She looks like shit in this movie. Shit with fake tits. Not only is she not attractive, but the camera continually captures her breasts, which are so fake it is a little disgusting. Sorry, but they don’t look like breasts, at least not human ones. So if you planned on seeing the film to see sexy Pam then you should avoid it.
She can’t act. That’s fine, a lot of people in film can’t act, for example Elizabeth Berkeley, star of Showgirls. But her acting is so bad she seems to come straight out of Plan 9 From Outer Space. She tries to be all tough and cool, to be a mysterious ass-kicking film noir type. She does this by speaking in a low monotone throughout the whole movie. Imagine a man in a coma narrating a film and you have a sense of her acting skills.
The “plot”: In a futuristic, post-apocalyptic world, there is a resistance movement against fascist authorities. I think the bad guys want to catch Pam because her DNA will help them find the resistance, or some shit like that. The dialogue in the movie is so bad and nonsensical that the plot was pretty vague. A better description of the plot would be: An ugly man with breasts runs around in the future for no reason as crazed military leaders try to kill her.
In the midst of all this bullshit, there are two great actors. It is obvious that acting is a job, and even well known actors will take any role because a job is a job. The evil military leader is Steve Railsback, who was brilliant and terrifying and insane as Charles Manson in the original film Helter Skelter. He’s also in Tobe Hooper’s horror film Lifeforce. He is terrible in this film, because he is way too over the top. When fighting Pam, he starts laughing like a madman. You expect him to stop but he doesn’t. For about three minutes, you can hear him cackling like a hyena. Do people really act like that? Fuck no.
Udo Kier, who has done so many great films, has a useless and irrelevant role in which he is not allowed to use his acting talent.
The cinematography is the highlight of the film. There is a big budget, and it shows (they probably saved a lot of money by hiring a monkey to write the script). The filmmakers create a convincing post-Apocalyptic world, beautifully captured on film. But it’s like taking a Picasso and smearing feces on it. The beauty of the film does not make up for the fact that this movie is fucking awful.
The movie’s catch phrase is Pam saying “Don’t call me babe” with no enthusiasm in her voice. You can almost see her reading the phrase off a cue card. Pamela, I’ll make a deal. I won’t call you Babe and you won’t act in anything other than straight-forward porn.
THE LOS ANGELES PORNO SAMURAI MASSACRE!
Speaking of porn, we all love the mixture of pornography and murder. Several of my favorite flicks are true crime films involving porn and murder. Examples:
Star 80 is a brilliant film about the brutal murder of Playboy Playmate Dorothy Stratton, whose obsessed weirdo husband killed her. Eric Roberts is the killer and it is his best role. He is just oozing sliminess and sleaze. Paul Schrader did the film (the man who wrote Taxi Driver) and Roberts’ character is as repulsive as De Niro as Travis Bickle in Taxi Driver. This case shocked a nation and the film is great.
Wonderland: Crack head porn star and owner of one of the biggest cocks in the history of mankind (supposedly he could not get a full erection, as all the blood rushes to the penis, and he would pass out or die if all of his blood went to his cock), John C. Holmes, was involved in a vicious multiple murder. Val Kilmer stars as John C Holmes (he is great as a crack addict in this film, and great as a meth freak in The Salton Sea) in a very intense film that climaxes in an extremely shockingly violent massacre. The DVD comes with a bonus disc featuring a documentary that contains crime scene footage, and the place is a mess, blood everywhere.
Our next porn massacre has not yet been made into a film but if it were I would see it.
Stephen Clancy Hill, a failed 34-year-old porn actor who went by the name Steve Driver, was recently fired from Ultima DVD studios, and evicted from the studio’s office where he lived. The studio is located in an area nicknamed “Porn Valley” in San Fernando outside Los Angeles. He did not take the news of his firing and eviction well, and on June 1, 2010, grabbed a samurai sword, a prop for one of their films, and started slashing away at two more porn stars. Herbert Wong (porn name: Tom Dong) jumped in to save his fellow actors and was slashed to death. He died from chest wounds in the hospital. I do not know what film the samurai sword was for. Hill is most known for playing President Barak Obama in the film Palin: Erection 2008. Interestingly, Hill and Wong had worked in two previous films together. The two actors were wounded and Wong was murdered.
At the time, Hill was on probation for carrying a concealed weapon (in a separate event).
Hill then disappeared with the sword for a few days. An L.A. SWAT team eventually trapped him by the edge of a cliff. He brandished the sword and threatened to kill himself, creating a police stand off that lasted most of the day. He either “fell” or was pushed off the cliff to his violent death 50 feet below. It is not clear if the non-lethal bean bags fired at him were what knocked him off the tall cliff.
Next month – Reality TV star mutilates, murders former playmate, then kills self (from 2009).
SOMEONE GET THESE MOTHERFUCKIN’ HEADS OFF THIS MOTHERFUCKIN’ PLANE!
On a plane bound from Arkansas, about 60 severed human heads were found, as part of an illegal organ trading scheme. Supposedly the heads were for medical research. But there is one problem — the company shipping the severed human heads and partial heads had its license revoked last year, making the selling and transportation of heads illegal and thus part of the underground organ trafficking market. There are rumors that one of the brains, which was very tiny, belonged to professional fuckhead Sara Palin.
In another flight some genius brought along rotting food which he placed in the overhead bin. The food was filled with maggots which escaped and rained down onto the passengers (like in Suspiria). I really, really, really hope that someone caught the incident on tape.
By the way, what would you do if you found a bunch of human heads? If you were Jeffrey Dahmer, you’d probably fuck and eat them. If it were me, there would be a soccer game.
THE RULE OF THREES
The Rule of Threes states that celebrities die in threes. Recently we’ve had the deaths of Gary Coleman, a guy from Slipknot, a Golden Girl, musical meat man Jimmy Dean, David Carradine, the guy from Type O Negative, Cory Haim, Dennis Hopper, Ronnie James Dio, and a few more I can’t remember. That is a lot of celebrity deaths! Technically Cory Haim was more of a washed up hopeless drug addict than a celebrity. Who will be next?
Vorarephilia: a sexual paraphilia in which a person is sexually turned on by the idea of being eaten alive, often roasted on a stick. Also common is the fantasy of being swallowed whole while alive. Dolcett Girls and women who desire to be roasted on stick and eaten by men, the term comes from the mysterious artist known only as Dolcett. This is basically a fetish for voluntary cannibalism.
THE 21ST CENTURY AND SERIAL KILLERS
Some of the most notorious serial killers were either caught or discovered in the 21st century. The BTK Killer was caught. The Green River killer was caught. The identity of the Zodiac Killer has finally been revealed. The identities of the men who killed the Black Dahlia were discovered. The Grim Sleeper has been caught. Still unsolved is the most infamous serial killer of all time, Jack the Ripper. There are many theories on who he was. Patricia Cornwell’s Case Closed claims that Jack the Ripper was artist Walter Sickert. Another theory is that he traveled to America and continued killing. Other suspects have included Lewis Carrol!
GARY COLEMAN: MURDERED?
Gary Coleman was found collapsed in his kitchen, head cracked open, and he died a few days later. His cause of death: he somehow ‘fell’ to the floor, splitting his head open. At less than five feet tall, his body didn’t have much of a fall. Yet his head cracked open like an egg. According to some ‘experts’ there are blood stains on the wall in the crime scene that indicate a murder. Looking at the crime scene pictures published in the National Enquirer all I could really see is a few brownish smudges.
Another unusual aspect of Coleman’s death was that the police immediately treated it as an accident, and not a crime, and they did not treat the house as a crime scene and seal it up to gather forensic evidence. In other words, no one tested the smudge on the wall to see if it was blood and whose blood it was, and presumably the room has been cleaned.
So did someone bash Gary’s little head open? We may never know, thanks to the police.
The big crime news has been the murder of Stephanie Flores by Joran van der Sloot, the key suspect in the death five-years-ago of Natalee Holloway in Aruba. He sold women into prostitution and probably has left a trail of corpses around the planet. Now he is rotting in one of the worst prisons in the world in Peru, where he is the prison bitch of a professional assassin.
More on van der Sloot and The Grim Sleeper will be in the next column.
Some more news items coming up — A French cannibal slit open his cell mate and ate his lung (thinking it was his heart), and he has been dubbed “The French Hannibal Lechter”.
Also coming up: L.A. serial killer Chester Turner, and the infamous Southside Slayer (who is probably actually five different people); the Black Dahlia crime solved; Evil clowns and clown murders; The Utah execution for murder of a Howard Stern fan; The murder of Morgan Harrington, a Virginia Tech student abducted from a Metallica concert; The Heart Attack Grill; L.A. – the city of serial killers; and more!
Stay sick fuckers!
David L Tamarin